You might be surprised at the many ways in which quitting alcohol can make a difference. I put the cap on in November 2015 after six years of reflection.
The main reason why I didn’t stop drinking alcohol earlier was because I thought a sober life would be dry and dreary. I was afraid that if I started spitting in the cup, I would become boring, stodgy and a social outcast.
Just seven years ago, there was no information available to anyone thinking about quitting about how life changes when you put the cap on.
I found shelf after shelf of stories in the library about the terrible things you do when drunk, and how alcohol destroys your life, but those stories ended when you got sober. I didn’t need to know what it feels like to drink alcohol and what it can lead to. I already knew that from my own experience. I was thirsty for information about a whole new dimension, life without alcohol.
Is there life at all without alcohol?
But I decided to take the plunge, put the cork down and started writing a book about my experiences and the long-term effects of quitting alcohol.
Possibly the world’s first sober curious book was born: free from wine, how life changes when you put the cork down (Wise Life 2016).
So what are the effects of stopping drinking alcohol?
When you put the cap on, the body starts to repair itself at the cellular level and soon that repair work is visible in the mirror image. But even greater change is happening invisibly, internally.
Nerve pathways will slowly begin to recover (unless alcohol has done irreversible damage) and with it comes wellbeing, restorative sleep, joy and peace of mind.
I will now explain how quitting alcohol affects you in the first weeks, months and year, and conclude with a list of 27 things that are affected by quitting alcohol. There are 27 in total.
Most of them I have experienced myself and I have also found scientific explanations for all of them.
Some of the effects I have listed can be found in the book Free from Wine, but some I have only discovered later, after the book was published.
I hope this text will inspire you to try a new, soberist life.
Ira
The first weeks after quitting alcohol
In the first few weeks (and even months) of sobering up, you may feel tired.
Your sleep quality will improve dramatically and you may wake up feeling refreshed and in a good mood, but in the afternoon you may be totally tired.
The intensity and duration of fatigue is influenced by the time of year, and the stressfulness of life at the time. And, of course, how long you have been impairing your recovery and sleep quality with alcohol. On the other hand, it may also be that you do not feel tired after sobering up.
But for most people, fatigue strikes because alcohol is eliminated from the body’s natural rhythm.
Alcohol is a sneaky way to build up sleep debt: it’s a stimulant and when you drink it you don’t feel tired. But when you stop using, the truth is revealed.
Anyone who has partied hard over the weekend knows that it’s not until Tuesday or Wednesday that you start to feel the same state of mind you had before the party.
Fatigue is also caused by the recovery of neural pathways and its consequence: increased creativity.
After a few weeks of being a soberist, you start having more dreams and when you’re awake, creative ideas start popping into your head at such a rate that you don’t know which way to turn. Brain work tires you more than any physical exercise. You can see it in the dog: he doesn’t get tired from throwing sticks, but he gets tired quickly from brain training.
So you may wake up feeling upbeat, cheerful and energetic, but by the afternoon you’re exhausted from all the thoughts that have popped into your head. This roller-coaster situation will even out over time.
External changes are also quickly noticeable:
After two weeks of sobriety, your waistline has already shrunk a little and your stomach has flattened. Of course, this also depends on your starting point and how much and how often you have used alcohol before quitting.
One month after quitting alcohol
Stress hormone levels are reduced, which you will feel as increased peace of mind.
Your body’s fluid and salt balance has returned to normal, which is reflected in your reflection and a reduced waistline.
Your blood pressure will have levelled out and you’ll find you feel better when exercising.
Two months after quitting alcohol
The waist has already narrowed considerably and the swelling has gone down. This is due to the restoration of the body’s fluid balance.
The brain works more quickly than before, melancholy recedes, joy increases.
Hair growth slows down (in women), pores are reduced, eyes are brighter.
You will feel more relaxed, it will be easy to be present and you will have more laughter and joy.
Three months after quitting alcohol
A variety of emotions will return to your life, replacing the drabness with colour and variety. You’re more energetic than before. Depression and depression may already be completely gone.
You may start to remember what you dreamed of as a child, and reach for that flame of passion that burned in you before alcohol came into the picture.
At this point, you may find that you have become a sugar mousse. You may not have been a sweet tooth before, but your body was used to getting its sugar fix from alcohol. Now that you’re not drinking, you might find yourself craving treats all the time.
One hundred days after quitting alcohol
Mental and physical well-being have improved considerably. You will increasingly feel happiness and joy, and peace of mind. Life feels good, and you may feel euphoric, like you’re in love.
Tiredness is gone, you’ll get a lot done and find yourself feeling the same joy and enthusiasm you once did as a child.
Your life expectancy has been extended because you have cut out alcohol, the biggest cause of premature deaths in working age.
If the drinking has not caused permanent damage, the liver has recovered and is functioning optimally again.
Six months after quitting alcohol
Life as a soberist already feels natural. You may have dreams where you drink, and in the morning you’re grateful it was just a dream.
Sobriety already feels so easy that you might occasionally toy with the idea that maybe you didn’t have a problem. Alcohol is an addictive substance and you are not yet completely free from it. Know that your problem was never that one reasonable glass (12cl or a bottle of beer) but all the doses that follow that first one.
One year after quitting alcohol
You have probably faced most of the situations in which you used to drink alcohol sober, as a sober person. That’s why the coming year will be easier: you will no longer experience sadness or melancholy on Midsummer or New Year’s Eve, for example. You already have new memories of these annual rites of passage. Good, atmospheric memories where you enjoy situations without alcohol.
And you really remember them, because you were sober.
Friendships that were based only on a common hobby: drinking alcohol, are likely to be broken or have already been broken. In return, your relationship with real friends will improve, and with the life change, you may also make new friends.
You are present in your life and can enjoy situations in peace. Your ego is reduced and you are truly yourself and more interested in other people.
Your self-esteem is boosted because you can trust yourself and you no longer get grumpy because you don’t get drunk. You dare to make changes that take you where you want to go.
**
27 things that stopping drinking affects
- YOU SLEEP BETTER. A Finnish study showed that even a single dose of alcohol impairs sleep. Alcohol prevents restorative sleep and thus the brain from being cleansed of waste products.
- BRAIN FUNCTIONS are clear, because alcohol is no longer destroying the deep sleep that cleanses the brain, nor is it interfering with the brain’s neurotransmitters and destroying brain cells.
- MEMORY IS IMPROVING, for the above reason.
- WORK IS INCREASED because your natural dopamine production is restored and your body starts producing happiness hormones.
- MASSENGER WANGS, for the same reason that joy increases.
- EYEBAGS SHRINK, because alcohol no longer upsets the body’s fluid balance.
- CRAMPS END em. reason.
- THE PORES IN THE SKIN SHRINK. The sugar content of alcohol damages the production of collagen in the skin and causes pores to dilate.
- THE SKIN COLOUR EVENS OUT. Alcohol causes dehydration and swells the tiny hair vessels in the skin.
- WRINKLES ARE REDUCED. Alcohol dries out the skin and deepens furrows.
- BODY WILL CAPITALIZE and VAT WILL LIFT as the liver and fat metabolism begin to function optimally. The fat around the internal organs starts to melt.
- FERTILITY IMPROVES. Many studies have shown that even moderate alcohol consumption reduces fertility.
- The stomach WORKS because the lining of the stomach heals and alcohol, which is a diuretic, is not causing constipation.
- THE EYE EYES LIGHT UP because the alcohol is no longer swelling the blood vessels around the eyes and the liver starts to function optimally (if it has not been permanently damaged).
- PATTERNS WILL STOP because you are no longer bumping into drunks and alcohol is not raising your blood pressure and dilating your blood vessels.
- THE PRESENCE IS EASY, because your mind is no longer wandering until the moment you get corked. You can only be there when you are sober, even a small amount of alcohol will take you out of the moment.
- YOU GET MORE TIME IN YOUR WEEK, because you don’t spend time thinking about, buying, using and hanging over alcohol.
- YOU’LL HAVE MORE ENERGY because you’ll get deep restorative sleep and your body will function better.
- ORGASMS GET STRONGER. Alcohol numbs the nervous system and the sense of touch. As a soberist, you will have an orgasm more easily and it will feel stronger. In men, alcohol causes erectile dysfunction.
- SEEKING IMPROVEMENT. Alcohol numbs the nerves, hinders arousal and disturbs presence.
- YOU WILL FEEL BETTER because when you stop drinking alcohol, your metabolism will improve and waste products will leave your body more quickly.
- YOU WILL FEEL HAPPIER AND MORE BALANCED as your body’s stress hormone levels are reduced and the production of natural happy hormones is improved.
- ALLERGY SYMPTOMS ARE REDUCED. A study shows that even a small amount of wine intensifies allergy symptoms.
- CONFIDENCE IS IMPROVED because you can trust yourself. No grumbles, because you don’t get drunk and fool around.
- MONEY IS SAVED because it is not spent on alcohol, bars, nightclubs, taxis…
- THE RISK OF CANCER IS REDUCED. Alcohol is a major risk factor for developing cancer of the mouth, throat, larynx and oesophagus, as well as liver, breast and bowel cancer.
- YOU STAY HEALTHIER. Alcohol consumption weakens the immune system. When you stop drinking alcohol, you’re less likely to get a seasonal flu, for example.
How does quitting alcohol affect your well-being, work and social relationships?
In March (11.3.2022), I conducted a survey of people who have given up alcohol. I asked how quitting alcohol has affected their lives, how much money and time they have saved that would previously have been spent on alcohol and its side effects.
I also asked them what health effects they had noticed after they had quit. I built the survey using SurveyMonkey and shared the link to the survey on social media in groups about alcoholism, recovery from alcohol addiction, sober curious and sober living.
52 people responded to the survey. For the time and money saving questions, I only took into account numerical answers.
Saving almost €4,500 in money and almost a month in time
You save quite a bit of money when you give up alcohol: an average of €374 per month.
This amounts to €4,488 per year. For that amount of money you can already get one or the other.
However, there was a large gap in the responses. Others drink in restaurants and take taxis, spending considerably more than those who drink at home in a shop or supermarket.
This saves 47.2 hours per month from alcohol consumption and its side effects of hangovers and disability. That’s almost 24 days a year, almost the equivalent of February.
Other positive effects of stopping alcohol consumption:
- 92 % Life management has improved
- 84 % I sleep better and wake up more alert
- 74% Energy has increased.
- 74% Shame and guilt have receded, replaced by pride in yourself.
- 63% Self-esteem has improved.
- 66% I’m better at work and at home.
- 61% I’m in a better mood than before.
- 61% Anxiety has disappeared and been replaced by peace of mind.
- 58% Creativity has increased.
- 48% My family/relatives have told me that getting sober has been good for me.
- 42% The waist has narrowed.
Stopping alcohol use brings positive changes in many areas of your life
When the word was free, this is how sober people told us about the consequences of leaving alcohol:
Overall better physical and mental well-being. Alcohol is no longer on my mind and I can concentrate on other things. Those close to me say that I am more present.
**
The best thing is not having to think about what you’ve done or said while drunk. I remember it all, and I can stand behind it as myself.
**
I’ve found that I don’t need the encouragement of alcohol, I can be myself when I’m sober. And I’m actually a pretty cool guy
**
My anxiety hasn’t completely disappeared, but I can handle it better when I’m sober.
There have been nothing but positive things to come out of sobriety.
**
Peace about yourself and what you do. I don’t have to spend energy on being afraid of a bad hangover and then biting it. I don’t have to think that I screwed up or anything.
The weekend could be a complete waste, first because of drinking and then because of a terrible hangover. Now I have time!
**
My activity in all areas of my life has increased significantly – including my contact with my loved ones. I helped again with my sporty lifestyle!
**
Improved sports performance, results and recovery. Improved metabolism.
**
The freedom to be myself, not to drink when others drink.
**
More energy, more cheerfulness, I’m more genuine and I sleep better. I feel better overall, not as grumpy as when I was drinking. I am more present at home.
**
I can keep my promises.
**
The most important thing is your own peace of mind, not anxiety. No more mind-numbing fatigue. No more crummy days at work. Relationship calmed down, relationship with children better.
**
With no hangover, the quality of free time is better.
**
In general, alcohol no longer dominates.
**
Real presence and ease of being. Even though it’s hard and difficult at times, it’s easier to deal with things when you’re sober. Gratitude.
**
Freedom.
**
Making art has become easier.
**
I have a life that I never had before I got sober – not even before I became an alcoholic, because before that I suffered from the alcoholism of my loved ones.
**
Better relationships at every level. I see the world brightly and love to seek/explore new things without fear. Solitude is not scary, it is enjoyable. Brain capacity has certainly expanded in a positive way. Easy to focus on several things at once.
**
I’ve got my sensitive self back.
**
Leaving alcohol behind brought healthier relationships. I’m mentally and physically healthier, I don’t have to worry about hangovers and I can see friends and do more than hang out in bars.
I’ve managed to repair my relationship with my adult children, I do the maximum number of gigs a month, I walk, I do water sports, I ski, I read, I travel.
I have been, and will be, involved in voluntary work and volunteering. I look after myself, I take the grandchildren to the club and I spend time with them. I study languages in English (Russian, Swedish, German, Spanish, French). I can afford different goods that I didn’t have before.
I have new friends and have attended various courses and Kela rehabilitation (asthma, sleep apnea, MTKL). I have sewn clothes as a hobby. I’m going hiking in Spain soon.
I’m into genealogy. I’m a pretty good guy these days. I don’t hang out with alcoholics anymore.
**
I can be a real mother to my children.
**
I work with substance abusers and that’s where I’ve made new friends. My confidence is back, I can take care of myself.
**
The downside of quitting alcohol:
- PALELU. If you sit out for an evening with friends who drink alcohol, you will sooner or later catch a cold.
Your friends won’t get cold because they don’t feel cold after drinking the nerve-paralysing alcohol. The solution is to get more clothes on and have some hot tea, mulled wine or even hot chocolate.
Is it easy to stop drinking alcohol then?
The benefits of drinking alcohol are undoubtedly clear, but is it easy to stop? Every now and then someone The “Quit drinking easily and happily” course participant says that quitting alcohol is not always so easy and fun. And it’s true.
The beginning is always the hardest part of a life change, and this is also true for quitting alcohol
It’s harder in the beginning, because you don’t know yet if you’ll be able to quit alcohol, and if you do, what it will lead to. When you haven’t yet reached the point where the positive changes that a sober life can bring have really come to the fore, you are at greater risk of giving up and quitting.
Difficult moments may come thick and fast in the beginning. It usually strikes when you first encounter a situation or feeling where you are used to drinking alcohol.
Once the numbing neurotoxin has been removed from the “medicine cabinet”, situations and emotions have to be faced sober. At first, it can feel unbearable to accept them raw.
During the first sober year, there will be moments of melancholy, especially during the holidays. It is normal and part of the divorce process. Just as when you miss a passionate but destructive relationship that did so much more harm than good, the person trying to quit alcohol sometimes misses the good times with alcohol.
The mind can play tricks, serving up memories of the good times when alcohol was still part of the picture, and the newly sober/divorced person begins to doubt their decision.
But the longer you’ve been sober, the easier it gets. Looking back from day one to now, there have been more easy and positive feelings than difficult and negative ones.
Difficult moments are really just moments, and they become fewer and fewer the further you get.
We reinforce what we focus on, which is why the course is called Free yourself from wine with joy and ease – not free yourself from alcohol with sadness and difficulty. The course is for people who want to stop using alcohol and who are motivated by joy and freedom.
There are other methods, and that’s good: one and the same medicine doesn’t work for everyone.
There has been surprisingly little tear-up
When quitting alcohol, the risk of relapse is highest in the first few days.
In discussions on the Drinking Link, it turns out that many people can go four days without drinking, and then they relapse and go back to square one. And soon they’re back on their feet for three or four days and back to square one, because getting sober seems insurmountably difficult.
Going back to day one, and going through the hardest part again and again without being able to enjoy the wonderfulness of soberism, takes energy and belief in yourself – and makes it harder to quit each time.
On the Soberist’s Get Rid of Wine Easily and Happily course, relapse has been far less common than staying sober. When some of the new starters were struggling with difficult moments during the summer heat, I decided to translate a passage from Clare Pooley’s The sober diaries (2017) for them.
Clare Pooley’s sobriety journey started the same way as my own: by writing an anonymous blog. She also realised she was not alone, and the blog started to gain more followers every day.
When Clare herself had reached the stage where sobriety was easy, she wrote a story for the “serial kickers” following her blog, which she believed would give her strength in difficult moments.
Since Clare’s brilliant work is still not out in Finnish, I’m sharing the story on this blog for all of you who need reassurance in your weak moments:
Clare Pooley’s riveting story:
Imagine you are standing in a meadow where you have been for a long, long time.
At first the meadow was beautiful, full of flowers, friends, sunshine and fluffy bunnies (maybe bunnies are an exaggeration, but whatever!)
Over time, being in the meadow has become more miserable. Sure, there are still some sunny days, but it often pours with rain, and sometimes it really storms.
The flowers have wilted.
The bunnies are also thinning and distant from each other.
Then you start to run into people who tell you about another meadow, not too far from your own. They have seen it. Some of them live there.
That meadow is everything your own meadow once was, if not better.
And the people who live there appreciate it so much because they have seen what your deserted neighbourhood looks like. They have also lived there.
“Hey, come live with us”, they invite you, because they know there’s plenty of room for everyone in their meadow, and they genuinely want new friends.
You are very keen to join them. But there’s a dilemma.
There’s a big barrier on the way to a new meadow, and you can’t see behind it.
All you see is an obstacle. You can’t see the promised meadow on the other side of the barrier.
You have no idea how far you have to go to get there, how long it will take you to get there, and whether you have the strength. But you know you can’t stay where you are. The situation is getting worse all the time.
So you take the leap and throw yourself in front of the first obstacle.
At first it’s not very difficult. You have a lot of energy and enthusiasm. But once you’ve survived the four-metre wall, the leech-infested ditch and dug your way under the fence by hand, you’re exhausted. You’ve had enough.
You have no proof that you can ever reach the wonderful meadow you’ve been told about. Desperate to get back, somewhere familiar, where you’re not so tired, cold and scared…
.. and then you return to your old meadow, your starting point.
It’s great to be at home at first. Other people will welcome you with open arms, and tell you that the other meadow doesn’t really exist.
You will be comfortable. You know what you are doing. You think the sun is still shining and you can see the bunnies in the distance.
But you’ve been fooling yourself.
There is not a single bunny left in your meadow. The storms are getting heavier and heavier.
Eventually, you’ll have to throw yourself into the four-metre wall again. You will encounter leeches again. Digging a tunnel. You’ll get over the fifth hurdle before you give up – and back to square one.
You return because you run out of faith. You have no evidence of another mowing. You don’t know how long it will take to get to the new meadow. You don’t know if you can do it. You’re at the end of your rope, having crossed the first hurdle so many times.
So, if you recognise yourself from this, listen to what I have to say. Because I know:
IT (THE MEADOW) EXISTS! IT’S JUST AS GOOD AND LOVELY AS YOU WISH. IT TAKES ABOUT A HUNDRED DAYS TO SEE THE MEADOW, AND ABOUT SIX MONTHS TO GET THERE. YOU CAN DO IT.
The hardest part of the journey is at the beginning.
So you really don’t want to throw yourself against the wall and the leeches again and again, and go back to square one.
Once you get over the worst, the obstacles become easier and fewer and fewer. At the same time, you will become stronger, fitter and have the resources to overcome obstacles.
One thing to beware of is drawing the wrong conclusions.
Sometimes you might think you’re already in a new meadow. You haven’t faced an obstacle in a long time and you think: great! Here it is, I did it!
And soon after, a mighty wall will appear in front of you.
But at this stage, you know how to overcome the obstacles. No worries.
You may already be beginning to understand the greater importance of overcoming obstacles. After all: a meadow without challenges and obstacles could be quite flat and boring.
So, my fellow adventurers, pack your bags, say goodbye to your old meadow and throw yourself into adventure and obstacles and keep moving forward!
And don’t look back until you’re there.
How to stop drinking alcohol?
If you’re convinced that quitting alcohol is right for you too and you’re ready to put the cork down – congratulations! You have made an important decision towards a prosperous and, above all, free life. The next step is to look at your situation and consider the nature of your addiction and the support you feel you need on your journey.
There are many different types of treatment available in Finland, but the important thing to remember is that not everything is suitable for everyone. When you’re looking for the best way to start a sober, sober life, read our article on the different addiction treatment options.
If you feel you can get sober on your own with the right tools and the support of a like-minded community, check out the Soberisti® method and the Easy and Happy Wine Free online coaching. In this method, quitting alcohol is a joyful process and is best suited to those who are still coping for the time being, but who know that life would be better sober.
